Barstool Sports is a fantasy job for thousands of stoolies. Daily, people sit behind their phone or laptop screens, type mean things in the chat, and watch on enviously with some belief that they could do it better, or at minimum, contribute to the cause. I am one of these people, minus the mean stuff in the chat part. The thing is with me, I'm not so delusional to the point of claiming I'd be some big splash at the stool or that I'd be better than anyone they currently have, I do believe I could be of assistance in some way, shape, or form.
People probably look at my page, Barstool Breakdown, and think, "Why the fuck would they hire this guy for content?", so I'm here to set the record straight, they won't. In the beginning of starting the channel that was honestly never the goal. Frankie and I weren't/aren't that naive. The goal is and always will be to support the pirate ship from afar, get to know the people who work there, and back-door my way into a production or blogging role. Obviously.
So I got to thinking, like say I get an interview with Barstool tomorrow and they asked, "What could you contribute here?", what would I have to say?
Production/Blogging Role
This feels obvious, so let's get it out of the way first, a production role of some sort would be the simplest fit. I have 2 years of sports production experience with Buckeye Cable Sports Network as a production assistant and cameraman. In the picture above, I was running lines for the sideline cam and Dannie Rogers before she left for the Lions to be their sideline reporter and host of One Pride. One thing about me, my head is always on a swivel.
Along with the camera and other BTS production things, I'm also learning more about Premier Pro daily. Look at episode one of The Breakdown where I could barely figure out how to keep 3 of us in one picture and fast forward to episode 52 where I'm bouncing around between 7 cameras like a producer in the truck, or for those that 10x, TJ on the yak. I am in no way saying I could do what TJ does but with a little help, I could learn fast. They pass the sticks to Lucas from time to time who's a server turned producer, let's keep that trend rolling.
Break glass in case of emergency: There are enough vibes in Chicago so send me up to New York to be a guy like Spider. Help anyone, anywhere, anytime, and keep the morale looking up. HQSpider = HQSandos. Got a nice ring to it.
As for the blogger part, see Barstoolbreakdown.com for my resume.
Mintzy's Version Of Jenks/Mikey Bets
Second time using this photo just to ensure I drive the point across.
I'm not the only one who's pitched an idea to try and help the self-proclaimed King Of The South reach next-level stardom. We all watched Mintzy Madison with Ohio's Tate come and go in the blink of an eye, so allow me to explain how this is different.
First, let's remember how Jenks started dating the Yak and how it led to a partnership with Frank The Tank and Mikey Bets. Now Frank & Jenks are hip to hip adding years to the King's life and spewing out weekly, damn near daily content. Jenks started as a superfan of a specific show, "dated" them by taking them courtside to Knicks games, and Tank took a liking to him. Now the 3 of them travel together and Frank has a constant camera following him around, as well as two dudes who love to hustle and try to make the Tank brand better and better.
Frankie and I "dated" plenty of Barstool personalities through our year of The Breakdown, got a tour of Barstool Chicago, and I've been a guest on Wake Up Mintzy twice. Not to mention that I've been to dinner with Mintzy only to have him leave before the bill came. Shout out to Secret for picking up the tab.
So the idea is as simple as that, I'd follow Mintzy everywhere, start a vlog or Mintzy Walks/Runs/Crowd surfs series, and watch the money pile up until we are both inevitably canceled because, well, it's Mintzy. Stoolies would love to see how the legend of the boosted parlays cooks up his plays and cooks in the kitchen. Who could forget the grilled cheese fiasco and when he served cold hot dogs to the Yak on his first attempt?
Mintzy is a gold mine of content that just needs a willing miner and a camera on both eyes at all times. Okay, you got me, two cameras may be required...
Currently, I work 2-3 jobs depending on the week, record and produce Barstool Breakdown, and still have time to hit the gym 5 days a week. I'm a self-motivated individual AND have a history of personal training. Let Sandos be the in-person air tag and let's get this man back to Speed Demon.
Those are the Big Two, so for the sake of time and length, I'll fire through some other roles I could fulfill.
PG 1, Barstool Basketball
Barstool Basketball's missing piece for rec league glory? Me. No offense to Marty Mush, but they lack in outside shooting and playmaking off the bounce. I know they aren't allowed to shoot 3's but Klemmer may not return and I think under player-coach Rico Bosco we can form a new regime. I'm talking run and gun, find the open man, and make some fucking plays. I'll lace 'em up anytime, anywhere to prove my prowess on the hardwood. Resume below.
Barstool Bartender
Gone are the days of Alex Bennet dumping a Coors Light into champagne and calling it "Light Pain". Plus they've already got a chef or 3 (Donny, MMM, & Frank), so why not add a mixologist? No degree necessary, I've got experience in family restaurants, poppin' local spots, and even nightclubs. This opportunity lines up perfectly for a High Noon or Pirate Water collab. I promise not to over-serve Nicky Smokes, no matter how much booger sugar he offers in return.
Security For Big Cat From The Upstairs Tik-Tok Girls
As simple as it sounds, like a secret service that only protects Big Cat from the constant bullying and harassment he endures from Hannah Montoya and Ella Griff.
Fart Eliminator/ Piss Dawg Sub In
I always got one or both queued up and have already popped the cherry of pissing my pants on camera during our JackMac episode.
All Time QB For Dinner With WSD
I like free food and would love to get to know the maniac that is WSD.
That's all I've got for now. I'm off to go watch JJ shoot 3's all night, you should too. Oh, and watch, like, and subscribe to this weeks episode. Link below, VIVA.
Nice hands Sandos!!
Classic Mintzy lmao pleasure was all mine ❤️